It was a cold, dreary morning. #2 was at my house, we were on the couch passing the hydrater. The latest Sesame Street episde was on and it was featuring the #1. This, of course, enraged #2. He said, "Why does he always get the spotlight. Why does he always come first. I'm tired of it, something should be done." I tried to calm him down but to no avail. He said, "I'm takng this into my own hands." I wanted to point out to him that as a number, he techincally had no hands, but it would only piss him off more.
#2 declared, "I'm calling R and S. R and S are known for their propensity for violence, plus they would do almost anything for the right price. So, he dialed them up and called them over. When they showed up, #2 and both of them got to talking about putting the keibash on #1. It was out of my hands so I did the only thing I could do; I called Cookie Monster. For those of you out of the loop, Cookie Monster is the big gambino of the the Sesame block. What he says goes, period, end of story. Cookie answered his cell and told me he would be right over to settle business. The Cookie Cadillac pulled up and next thing I knew Cookie was at my door. He had brought his henchmen, Oscar (AKA the grouch) and The Count (ahahahhh). Cookie got right in #2's face and said, " Cookie hear bout plans for #1, yet nobody ask for Cookies O.K. #2 tried to say he was going to check first but Cookie raised his blue paw to interrupt him. "Cookie also has questions about cookie shipment you were supposed to move. What bout that." #2 said, "I've moved most of it, I just don't have the cash on me." Cookie, looking out the window into the distance, grumbled, "Why then you have crumbs in your pocket. Cookie thinks you are breaking the fourth cookie commandment, never get high on your own supply." #2 tried to stammer a response but Cookie cut him off. "Playing with my cookie profits is like playing with my emotions," said Cookie. He motioned to his henchmen, who grabbed #2 and dragged him out to the Cookie Caddy. Cookie turned to me and said, "Cookie take care of your problem, just keep watching my show and I'll give you a shout out. He turned to R and S and said, " You call Cookie before you even put a thought together, now get out of my face." R and S scrambled out with their tails between their legs. Cookie said goodbye and got in his Caddy and sped off with #2 due for some retribution. Me, myself had a hankering for some milk and Chip's Ahoy. Then I returned to see if there was anything else good on T.V.
End Transmission
BMan out
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