2ndchance

Disconnected and Discombobulated

My stupid cell phone has been only working on and off for the past week.  Since it is my only phone, that presents a bit of a problem.  I managed to make a few calls with it plugged into household current, then with a new battery.  Now, two batteries and some headaches later, it is finally holding a charge. At least it was the battery, and I don't have to buy a new phone. 

Surprisingly, when I put the second battery in I got several voice mails and one text.  Why these didn't download earlier with the home current or first battery I don't know, but it is a bit disconcerting.

In addition, I woke up with a toothache two nights ago.  Unfortunately, it appears to be a tooth with a crown.  The last time that happened, they had to remove the crown and do a root canal.  Ever have a root canal done?  It's something to really look forward to, let me tell you.  So I guess I will call my dentist tomorrow morning and hope that he can fit me in sometime soon.  In the meantime, I'm gulping Tylenol and chewing on the opposite side of my mouth.

Ok, done whining now.

Yuck

For the first time in a while, I feel 'yuck'.  Don't want to see nor be seen by people.  Don't want to go out, don't want to stay in, don't want to play WoW. . .just yuck.  Comes from the shingles pain finally breaking me down. . .being put back on pain medication with the prospect of going to see a neurologist. (great, another doctor) Comes from the bipolar which is putting me through a mixed episode.

Anyway.  Just a few notes from reality to post here.  Had a really good weekend. Perhaps this is just the balance.

Little by Little

Little by Little. . .(cue Robert Plant)

Things are on a slow curve clear up with the eye.  The rash is much better and the eye is no longer swollen shut.  I still want to wear a pirate patch though, as the eye makes me look like I'm demon possessed.

There has been some concern from the doctors about the ocular pressure (which is high), so I am now on three different kinds of eye drops.  I'm being co-paid to death because of seeing the docs every few days; but thank goodness I have insurance.  The recovery time frame on pain and discomfort stretches out for the next six months or so.

Bottom line is that it is getting better.  Thanks for the comments and also to my various drivers over the past week. . .especially my mother.

Ate at a new place today. . .Max & Erma's.  I had the Tomato Mozzarella Chicken sandwich which you can find at the top right of this page.  Can't begin to tell you how good it was.  Go find a Max & Erma's in your neighborhood.  Now.

Eye Eye Eye

This will be a short entry.  Somehow I've managed to get shingles. . .and got it in my left eye.  Not only is it painful, but the left eye is swollen shut and the right eye is blurry.  Don't know how long it takes to run it's course, but in the meantime, writing anything at all is a real chore.

So, hopefully I'll be back soon.

Sticky Web

Something has been really bugging me lately.  A subtle side effect of all the meds I am on and the ECT treatments I have had, is a 'dulling' of my intellect.  I notice it in all areas of my life.

In talking with my friends, it seems like I am always behind in processing the conversation.  Playing Scrabble and other games has become very difficult for me.  On a website where I am a moderator, I no longer participate in the intellectual discussions.  I also can't seem to make informed decisions in moderating. . . .to the point where I feel like I should resign.

There was a time when this brain of mine functioned right.  I could hold my own with advanced logic, philosophy, ethics, etc.  I could shape my thoughts in order to help people.  Now it feels like I have had a sticky web thrown over me.  Clawing through it to make a point is almost impossible.

This is hard to explain, but let me try.  Picture a task or academic discipline that daunts you. . .that you can't seem to understand no matter how hard you try.  Then imagine that you used to be able to do it. . . .and now you can't.

S Day

Surgery is scheduled for Tuesday, October 4th, at 1:30pm.  Nothing to eat or drink after midnight the night before.  Gah. . .nothing to drink for over 24 hours?  My eyelids will be stuck to my eyeballs and my mouth will be one big piece of sandpaper.  I can understand 12 hours or even a bit more.  But 25 1//2?  Just pour water on me and I'll re-constitute after the surgery.

I get fitted for my cervical collar the day before.  Oh goody!  Meet the monster thingie that you have to wear for the next month 24/7.  Apparently, I will wake up from surgery with it on. . . .superglued to my torso and stapled together for good measure.

Not really, but it sounded good when I wrote it.

*edit*  Well yeah, nobody mentioned that my math is way off.  I can only whine about going w/out water for 13 hours.  D'OH!

A Pain in the Neck

For a little over a month now, I have had what I thought to be a pulled muscle in my back.  It would be especially annoying at night. . .and I would slather on the Icy Hot and load up on Advil.  Most nights, I just couldn't get comfortable, and would end up wandering about my place or sitting in my easy chair.

My brain hurts

Have been in a dark tunnel.  Nothing and nobody, despite best efforts, can penetrate the walls.  Did not/could not go into work today.  So my job is almost definitely gone now.  Missed my appointment with the doctor this morning.

Hide

Rapid cycle.  Stayed out from work today and probably tomorrow and tomorrow.  Went to see my counselor and don't feel better.  Tried to 'escape' by watching some movies and reading some books.  It can help at times to do something non-stressful so I stop thinking about everything.

Interactions

Had to stop taking lithium on orders from my doctor.  The indocin which I'm taking for my foot is screwing up the lithium levels and giving me toxic side effects.  (you don't want to know)  The acute need of my foot healing takes priority over the chronic need of my bp.